The Unionized Statists of Obama

Dear Tax Paying Citizen of the United States of America,

Your Congress and White House Administration are hard at work! Here are some of the issues we have been debating and deciding on:

1. After much debate and consideration, we have decided to change the name of our country, and we would like you to know that you may write or email us with your own ideas for a new name, but that we won't actually read any of your suggestions, and we certainly won't take any of your own desires into account as we consider a new name. We just wanted to let you know that we are actually doing something here.

We tossed around several ideas, hoping that a new name will better reflect the current "mood" of our nation. "The United States" will soon be a superfluous term, as it is becoming more apparent that we are turning over the authority of this nation to labor unions. The name "The Unionized States of America" was bandied about, but was finally rejected as it wasn't quite on target in representing the type of nation we are happily evolving into.

The next suggestion, "The Unionized Statists of America" was nearly a perfect name, as it represents our union-centric central government, and it describes the type of government we are ascending to. Additionally, as everything becomes more nationalized, legislation on the state level will become more obsolete. Eventually, we will no longer need any states at all, so we decided using "Statists" was similar enough to "States" that most people would either not object or simply would not notice, as they are typically fixated on philandering celebrities and philandering politicians.

That name, however, was finally rejected when it was brought to our attention that the word "America" is actually an homage to a dead white guy. As a more appropriate homage to the new and improved multi-cultural divinity that we are, we felt it would be much more precise to honor the One man who has been the catalyst for all of our recent joyous accomplishments. We feel that you will surely agree with our decision, and that it will certainly make you feel good knowing we have chosen this path.

Therefore, the new name of our country shall henceforth be known as:

"The Unionized Statists of Obama"

New coinage and bills are being printed bearing this new name as this letter is being dictated. All government stationary will now be imprinted with the new name and the new symbol for our nation.

2. It was also decided, unanimously, to replace the stars and stripes with our new symbol, which represents unity and Oneness with each other. New flags are being sent to all public and private schools, the Unionized Statists Post Offices, and state capitols (which will soon house federal offices for the millions of jobs the One created).

3. In the spirit of unity, your hard working Congress decreed today that there will no longer be a two party political system, as the only discernible difference between the two parties is the letter "D" and the letter "R." In order to reflect our more enlightened society, we have decided to adopt a new political party name: Utopicrat. All serving politicians will now have the letter "U" behind their name - not as a label, since that is no longer necessary, but as a symbol of our homogeneous Unity.

Over the next few months, you will be receiving occasional updates on the progress being made by your hard working Congressional members. We encourage you to keep apprised of new developments so that you will be prepared for the inevitable tax increases that will ensue.

Please, don't hesitate to not call our offices or send us emails, as we are more than happy to not have to take into consideration our "constituents" complaints or suggestions.

Thank you,

Your Hard Working Congress - U and the White House Administration - U

To Those of Us Who are Gifted: I Salute Us!

I've been spouting for awhile on myspace, then on Townhall, and now on Smart Girl Politics. I recently added blogger to that list, so now I'm up to four blogsites.

And I'm not even getting paid.

So I've decided to devote all of my future blogs on myspace to the stuff going on in my life - a sort of "Family and Friends" edition. I'll save my political rants for this venue, Townhall, and SGP. I'll cross post at each one.

What a chore.

I have no idea how to garner followers, but I can say that receiving comments is very important to me! I reply to every comment as well - I think one of the best things about being able to blog is the ability to engage in dialogue afterwards. How many times have you read a magazine or newspaper article and thought to yourself "Dammit! I want to dialogue with someone about this crap!"

My last couple of posts have been relatively serious ones, although my open letter to jeaneane garololololow was kind of fun.

By the way, here's an open message to Mr. O: I'm not a tea bag waver. I'm a flag waver.

I'm not a community activist or organizer or a political rabble rouser. I'm just an ordinary person who is witness to the current trend of unprecedented and extraordinary events.

I've been amazed at how many other people I have found who are like me: gifted. That's right - all of us conservatives who are scouring the internet, looking for yet another article and more information and reading each others blogs and leaving comments... we are ALL gifted.

We have been blessed with the gift of discernment. How else can one explain the vast difference between what we hear Obama say and do and what liberals hear him say and do? This is bigger than the difference of political and social beliefs between liberals and conservatives during Bush's reign. This difference runs much deeper to the core of who we are, not just what we think.

We have something innate - some kind of radar or warning signal that blares "Warning! Warning! Incoming Lies! Incoming Lies!" whenever he starts to read his teleprompter.

We have also been gifted with the ability to see the connections and patterns, even when the dots aren't prefectly lined up.

For example, I read a quick little something during the presidential campaign about Obama being involved with some guy named Ayers. So I looked him up. Wow!

Then I read about Obama being connected with some guy named Tony Rezko, so I looked him up. Wow!

Then I read about Obama receiving campaign donations from some guy named George Soros. Wow!

Three times doth a pattern make. After that, I started finding names and organizations in practically every article I read: ACORN, Moveon.org, Democratic Socialists of America, The Tides Foundation... one link after another. One connection after another. And most of these names appeared in MSM articles. They didn't know it, but it was the MSM who provided the ammunition I needed to finalize my opinion about Obama.

I would see that Michelle Obama worked for someone and got paid a fee, then find out that this someone was a former chair of some committee that some other nefarious acquaintence of Obama's had established using money donated from this guy who also donated to Obama, etc., etc. I started to wonder if I was reading too much into all of these connections - perhaps I was degenerating into a *gasp* conspiracy theorist!

Then I discovered some conservative websites, and LO! I started reading other blogs and comments and articles written by conservative pundits and I said "Fantastic! I'm NOT just seeing dust motes in the air! There really ARE connections and links between all of these people and organizations and Obama! See? Other people say so, too! I am validated! Woop!"

Then, of course, I would remember that figuring out Obama's real motivation was not an occasion for wooping it up.

And now here I am, on a path - a road - with other like-minded people who are worried and frightened, and pissed off and sick of the bullshit. And who sit here, day after day, absolutely flabbergasted by the outrageous conduct of this so-called POTUS. And the outrageous conduct of the MSM and their sycophantic shoe licking. And the outrageous refusal of the starry-eyed to consider for even one moment that they might have elected into power a true blue ringer.

Well, there ya have it: an introduction to S'marty, a nifty little nickname bestowed upon me by a dear friend who likes to tease me about being a know-it-all.